Interested In Counselling But Still Have Some Concerns? …
“Talking Can’t Really Change Anything”
Many people wonder how ‘just talking’ about things can possibly help – especially if their problems involve difficult life-events that simply can’t be changed.
But psychotherapy or counselling is a different kind of conversation. We orient ourselves to the detail of your experience; we pay attention to the things that normally get skimmed over; we ask different questions. We’ll maintain a gentle, steady curiosity about you and whatever you’re facing.
As things get spoken out loud and looked at together, the circular narrative that takes place in the closed circuit of your own mind can begin to shift – to move forwards. You and your story start to ‘make sense’. You can stop operating so often on autopilot, and start choosing different responses to the world where appropriate. Talking enables us to find a path, together, through your current difficulties, to a more peaceful place.
“It Will Take Too Long”
It’s very common for people to worry about how long counselling or psychotherapy will go on for. You might be concerned about it being a bit vague and directionless, or about you becoming dependent on it. Or you may worry about the whole process costing more than you can afford.
Of course therapy can sometimes take a long time, where sensitive issues need to be gently explored in some depth. But I’ve seen plenty of other instances where people make huge strides forward in just a few weeks.
I am experienced in working both short-term or long-term, as needed. So you can have confidence your counselling will never be rushed or forced, but it also won’t go on any longer than it needs to. We’ll work according to your personal needs and natural pace, until you feel able to meet life with confidence and resilience on your own.
“It’s Too Late For Me – This Is Just The Way I Am”
Some people worry that their problems have been around for so long, there’s no point in trying to change.
But there’s no time limit on resolving a problem, and definitely no upper age limit for counselling. In fact, modern neuroscience has proven that although the brain undergoes some natural ageing processes over time, it never loses any of its original ‘plasticity’, or flexibility. In other words, even when old patterns are quite ingrained, we never lose the capacity to change.
This means that in our counselling sessions, we can work together to loosen even the oldest and seemingly most entrenched habits or difficulties. It’s never too late to find a sense of ease.
“It’ll Just Open A Can Of Worms…”
It’s true that looking at yourself and your life with honesty and clarity – as psychotherapy and counselling ask you to do – can be challenging at times. You may worry it will all be too ‘messy’, and feel things are better left neatly ‘packed away’. You might fear that you will be judged… or that you will fall apart if you start dismantling the scaffolding that has held you together till now.
However, most people find that looking at the difficult stuff is just one part of a helpful process of understanding, cleansing, and moving on.
And if that still doesn’t feel safe for you, then I have also undertaken specialist training which enables me to help you achieve change in the present without discussing all the details of the past. So you never have to talk about anything you don’t want to.